Shoes
You will remove them to step onto the mandap, to enter a home where a ceremony is held, and in a temple. At a hotel or hall, guests seated in the audience usually keep theirs on. Wear shoes that are easy to slip off.
Vedic Wisdom
Attending a Hindu wedding as a non-Hindu guest — what to expect and what to wear
Invited to a Hindu wedding and not sure what to expect? This guide answers the questions guests usually have and are too polite to ask, so you can relax and enjoy the day.
Quick answer
In short
What should I wear to a Hindu wedding?
Something colourful and modest. Indian dress is welcome but not expected; a smart dress with covered shoulders or a suit is perfectly fine. Bright colours are the norm. Many families prefer guests to avoid all-black and all-white, which are associated with mourning in some traditions — if in doubt, ask the couple. Be ready to remove your shoes at the mandap, at a home or in a temple.
What will actually happen?
A Hindu wedding is a series of rites under a canopy called the mandap, with a small sacred fire at its centre. Guests sit and watch; you may be invited to bless the couple at the end. It is normal for guests to talk quietly and move around during parts of it, and it is entirely acceptable simply to watch. If the priest gives explanations in English, listen — that is what they are there for.
You are very welcome
The first thing to know is that you are wanted there. Hindu weddings are family and community occasions, and a guest who has come with an open mind is exactly the kind of guest the couple hoped for. Nobody expects you to know the customs. The second thing to know is that a Hindu wedding is not one ceremony but many — each with its own meaning — and that the atmosphere is warmer and less formal than a church wedding. People come and go, children run about, and the couple’s relatives will almost certainly look after you.
Hindu weddings vary a great deal between regions, communities and families, so this guide describes what is common rather than what is universal. A Gujarati wedding, a Punjabi wedding and a Tamil wedding will look and sound different. If the couple have arranged for the ceremony to be explained in English, which many now do, you will be told what is happening as it happens.
What you will see
The shape of the day
A common pattern. Timings, order and names differ between families.
01
The groom’s arrival
baraat
The groom often arrives in a procession with music and dancing, and is welcomed by the bride’s family at the entrance. Guests on the groom’s side may join the procession.
02
Under the mandap
The ceremony takes place under a decorated canopy with a small contained fire at the centre. The couple, their parents and the priest sit inside; guests sit facing it.
03
The bride’s arrival
The bride is brought to the mandap by her family. In some traditions a cloth is held between the couple until the chosen moment.
04
The rites
The parents entrust their daughter to the marriage, the couple’s hands are joined, offerings are made into the fire, and the couple circle it and take seven steps together. This is the heart of the wedding.
05
Marks of marriage
The groom may place a necklace, the mangalsutra, on the bride and apply red powder to the parting of her hair. Rings may also be exchanged.
06
Blessings
The elders bless the couple, and guests are often invited to come forward and do the same, or to shower them with flower petals or rice.
Practical questions
The things people wonder about
Sitting and standing
There is no standing for the entry or kneeling. Guests sit throughout and stand only if invited — usually to bless the couple at the end. If everyone around you stands, stand.
Photography
Most families are relaxed about guests taking photos, but a professional will be working. Do not block their view of the mandap, avoid flash close to the fire, and put your phone away during the quieter moments if others have.
Food and drink
The meal is very often vegetarian and, at the ceremony itself, alcohol is usually absent. A reception later may be different. Prasad — a sweet or fruit blessed during the ceremony — may be offered to you; take it with your right hand or decline politely.
Gifts
Cash in an envelope is common and often given in an amount ending in one, such as £51 or £101, which is considered auspicious in many families. A gift from a list, if there is one, is equally welcome. Ask a relative if unsure.
Children
Almost always welcome, and usually present in large numbers. A Hindu wedding is not a quiet ceremony and nobody will mind a restless child.
Greetings
A namaste — palms together, a slight bow — is always appropriate. A handshake is fine too. Elders are greeted first if you are introduced to a group.
How long it takes
Longer than a civil ceremony, and timings are often approximate. Arrive when invited, expect the ceremony to last a good part of the morning or afternoon, and settle in. No fixed duration is published here because every wedding differs.
If you are asked to take part
You may be invited to bless the couple, to throw petals or rice, or to join a procession. Nothing is required of you beyond good will. If you would rather not take part in a religious act for reasons of your own faith, a warm smile and a nod are entirely acceptable and no offence is taken.
Questions
Common questions
Yes. Hindu weddings are family and community occasions and guests of every background are welcome at the ceremony. Nobody expects you to know the customs, and many families arrange for the rites to be explained in English.
It is best avoided. Many families associate all-black and all-white with mourning. Bright, modest clothing is the norm, and Indian dress is welcome but not expected.
To step onto the mandap, enter a home where the ceremony is held, or enter a temple, yes. Seated guests at a hotel or hall usually keep them on. Wear shoes that slip off easily.
Cash in an envelope is common, often in an amount ending in one such as £51 or £101. A gift from a list is equally welcome. Ask a relative of the couple if you are unsure.
Longer than a civil ceremony and it varies between families and traditions, so no fixed duration is given. Arrive when invited and expect the rites to take a good part of the morning or afternoon.
Written by Shastri Ji Manishbhai Pandya. Last reviewed . Hindu practice varies between regions, communities, families and sampradayas; this guide explains a widely recognised form and is not a ruling on how any family should observe it.
A question is always welcome
Planning a wedding with many first-time guests?
An order of ceremony or guest guide can be prepared where a family asks for it, subject to religious approval, so that every guest can follow the day. Tell us what you are planning.